I’ve never enjoyed orientations. Small “get to know you” events before middle school and high school set me on edge. Orientation week before college made me miss home more than I thought possible. I loved working at a cafe in college in part because I was able to learn on the job instead of undergoing a more traditional training. For whatever reason, I don’t feel settled in a new role until I actually start it. Orientation sometimes feels like a waiting period that is preventing me from getting started.

The first few weeks with House of Brigid were no different. If anything, I was even more unsettled than I had been in the past. It’s my first time working in a church and I am thousands of miles away from my loved ones. Even though I’ve lived in Dublin before, it was a big change. I spent the first week and a half fighting jet lag and wondering when I would start to feel not only spiritually fulfilled but even settled in my role. I loved getting to know the other people working at the church and my community members; I enjoyed daily Mass; I slowly started to get a handle on what the average day looks like. But I got home every night still waiting for a moment for everything to click.

Now that I am almost done with my third week here, I am reminded of a quotation from one of my favorite books, Beartown. The book is about–among other things–a town devoted to hockey, and one character says, “the only thing the sport gives us are moments. But what […] is life apart from moments?” The same can be said for working in a parish. I’ve come to the realization that I will likely not experience one definitive lightbulb moment. There will not be one instant when everything makes sense and I will feel like an expert in my role.

Rather, I am lucky enough to be able to look forward to a collection of moments, each one showing me that I am capable of serving the parish well. In only three weeks I am able to look back at a seemingly endless number of moments when it felt like things clicked, if only briefly. Saint John Henry Newman’s Feast Day, when I remembered the names of all of the parishioners I talked to. Taize, when I had a long conversation with someone during tea and biscuits. When I knew how to prepare the choir gallery for Sunday Mass with little help. When I felt confident enough during a staff meeting to make a joke that went over well. Each of these moments and so many more make up my life here, and each of these moments are evidence for myself that I am settling in well.

Over halfway through my third week, orientation is over. I’m still learning, but I am already growing more comfortable in my responsibilities. Each day, I experience a few more moments that bring me closer to full confidence. After each such moment, I try to pause, to thank God for the opportunity to serve with House of Brigid in Dublin, to be grateful for all that I have learned, and to ask for patience with myself as I continue to grow.